Dear Miss Pearl,
I have a problem. I'm 26 years old, college educated and
from what I'm told, very attractive. Actually, I think I am above average since
I have been approached about modeling several times in my past.
I have
had several girlfriends in my past, but for the most part I have remained
single. There are rumors that I am gay because I don't ever have a girl for a
long time and I hate having to defend my sexuality because it's not
necessary.
I have stopped hanging around most blacks because I get tired
of constanly being asked who I'm having sex with, or if I'm gay because I'm not
trying to get into the pants of every woman I meet. To be honest, it's not that
I'm not into women, but I am a virgin.
I will date a woman, but I have
never dated one who didn't try to get me into her pants within a few days, so
usually when I think a chick is about to try to go there, I lose interest
because I don't know how they will take me telling them no.
I don't even
know why I'm a virgin, but mostly I am scared to have sex. No, never been
molested, not gay, not interested in children, I just don't know what to do. I
notice that hanging around white people is a LOT different because I am not
harrassed about $ex and the who did it, why and when thing I get with my black
friend.
I have never been accused of being soft, or gay because I'm not
trying to have $ex with every woman I meet, but I don't know what to do at this
point. I don't think that I'm ready to have $ex because the thought of it makes
me nervous, I love my black women, but they don't know what to make of a man
like me.
What can I do to get over this $exual
bondage?
Brian
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear
Brian,
I'd like to commend you on being able to hold out for so many
years and not succumbing to the pressures of a $ex-filled society - and then I
want to volunteer to boink you to DEATH when you finally get ready to release!
LMAO!!!
Honestly, this is one of the few times I don't really have advice
because I don't have experience with men who aren't ready to become $exually
active when my truth is that I'm known to pull my housecoat up over my waist in
the shed and give the milkman, mailman and the man who cuts my grass a
hit.
I'm going to leave this one for your cousin's to answer - Fam, what
should your cousin do here? Are there any women out there who want an
inexperienced 26 year old man?
Should he be worried about his lack of
"interest"?
Keep it together. I commend your effort too. When you meet Mrs. Right you will be more than comfortable with revealing your history. Maybe seeing a sex therapist when the times right also could help. These people are trained professionals who know how to assist with pre concieved inhibitions that may inhibit your sexual growth. Again, I truly believe that when you find the perfect girl that fits you. It will be easy to pull back the layers of anxiety and insecurity. Good luck my brother.
ReplyDeleteWhere do you live? We can talk about it :-)
ReplyDeleteI would think it's rare to have a situation of this type but it's most important that U just be yourself. U dont have 2 give an explanation to everyone about your interest or lack thereof in sex. U might want to get some counseling to fine tune your position.
ReplyDeleteHire a escort they won't judge and will help you get over your fears you won't be embarrassed or feel pressured because you won't know them personally & if that does not work find a boyfriend cause u gay.
ReplyDeleteI don't think that there's anything wrong with you at all! Sounds as if you have high standards and rightfully so. Save yourself for that special woman (perhaps your wife.) First you must find a true compatible female friend. I hope she's deserving of you...if you have a kind heart.
ReplyDeletecudos to you. i love men who exhibit self-control in this area. hope you find someone deserving.
ReplyDeletegay or afraid women will laugh at your small peepee!
ReplyDelete