Dear Miss Pearl,
I am having an affair with my boss and I am afraid to
break it off because I know that he will fire me if I do.
relationship with "Michael" began not long after I started working for the
company as a receptionist. Mike was the chief financial officer, he was young,
very handsome for a white guy and married. At first, he started off stopping by
my desk joking with me every now and then. It was hard to tell if he was
flirting or was just a "cool white guy".
Then I started getting flowers
delivered to the office from my "secret admirer" and I honestly never thought
that it was him because he was one of the people who would stop by and ask about
them. They came every week for a month and a half until one day, I was in his
office giving him a message and he asked me to sit down. He said something like,
"What else do I have to do besides the flowers?"
I was shocked, for one I
had no idea that Mike was the man behind the flowers and two, because I was
turned on that a sexy white guy like him would be interested in me. I agreed to
meet him for drinks and our relationship eventually turned into a full fledged
affair. He eventually got me promoted to an administrative assistant position at
the firm and then agreed to help me pay for school.
I was living in a
small efficiency apartment at the time and he even moved me into a larger
apartment and gave me a monthly "allowance" of $2,000. At first, I saw him three
or four times per week after, and sometimes during lunch hours at work.
Occasionally, when he could get away, he would come to my house on the weekends
and just hang around.
Eventually, he started slowing down his visits and
I was hurt, but I tried to understand since he has a wife and two little boys.
After we talked, he told me that he was on the brink of divorce when we started
seeing each other, but he and his wife decided to work things out. He also told
me that he was going to keep giving me my allowance as long as we could still
see one another every now and then.
I agreed and started dating other
people. Then I met a man I really like and decided to move him into my apartment
and we are thinking of getting married. Mike found out and went ballistic. He
stopped paying my bills, but my boyfriend was paying me half the rent anyway, so
it really wasn't that big of a deal.
I told Mike that I'm thinking about
getting married and he told me that if I do, he wasn't giving me any more money
and that he will get me fired.
I like my job because I make good money
and I don't want to leave. The good thing is that Mike gave me money for school
and I paid it all off.
How can I tell this man to leave me alone so that
I just work in
Girl, bye!! First of all,
you shouldn't have gotten involved in a relationship with your boss in the first
place, much less your married boss - but you did, so deal with the consequences
of your actions!
You got your schooling paid for, he put money in your
pocket every month, got you a promotion and STILL paid your rent - personally, I
think you made off like a bandit. Appreciate it and move the f*ck
You weren't forced into a $exual relationship with this man. You
are no victim! There was no pressure & no oppression, you were turned on by
what you describe a weathly, "sexy" white boy and you went for yours, now deal
with whatever comes next.
I'm out, 'cause I've got $hit to do!
you want advice from Miss Pearl, send me an email to: email@example.com